“Hi New Neighbors on Prospect Place, Welcome to the neighborhood. We’re all glad to have you. I can tell you feel comfortable and safe here because you have lived in your newly renovated first floor apartment for 2 months now and yet have not put up curtains in your bathroom. As a result, while sitting on my couch in the evenings, or when working in my yard, or while having guests over for a beer on the back patio, I get treated to the sight of your bare ass as you sit down on your toilet right by the window.”–Brooklynian