The Robert Scarano building on Bond Street, which we last heard from when a guard dog got loose and mauled a dog being walked, has gotten a name: Satori. It will be marketed by the Developer’s Group. The building has had an interesting history, starting with the demolition of an historic carriage house and continuing through more than three dozen complaints, Stop Work Orders and a construction process that has carried on more than three years. We nicknamed it “The Bunker” early on because the small windows on the Bond Street side reminded us of big gun placements. Little did we know that The Bunker would go on the market as Satori. About 2.5 seconds after getting this photo from a reader, we hit up Google to find out what the hell “satori” means. (Our first guess was “dog bite” followed by “tiny windows.” Sadly, we had forgotten the Bauhaus song, Satori.) Per Merriam-Webster, “satori” means: “Sudden enlightenment and a state of consciousness attained by intuitive illumination representing the spiritual goal of Zen Buddhism.” Therefore, we now have the attained the ability to say “enlightment,” “Zen Buddhism” and “Robert Scarano” all in the same sentence. Wikipedia explains further: “Satori is the raison d’être of Zen, without which Zen is no Zen. Therefore every contrivance, disciplinary and doctrinal, is directed towards satori.” Or, you know, selling condos in Gowanus. We heard a rumor that they really meant to name the building “Sayonara,” but that the sign maker was hard of hearing and feeling very Zen, so it ended up as “Satori.” We can say this rumor is untrue, however.

Sudden enlightenment. Truly.