We haven’t been paying much mind to the gems that come across the transom from our dear and thoughtful friends at Park Slope Parents, but a reader brought a discussion about how to avoid “cussing” in front of the little ones to our attention. How the fuck, exactly, does one avoid dropping the F Bomb in front of Junior? Here’s one email we sample copy & paste for the benefit of readers who, in front of their three-year-old, don’t want to call someone a flaming asshole who should go eat shit and die painfully:

…Our gal is 7.6 yo and today said “What the hell?” to her father, which is unexplored language territory in our home so far. She is the second youngest of 8 cousins and she has seen them a lot over the the Holiday’s, so I think it’s copy catting. However, we her parents are not innocent either. Him more than me, and I am only guilty under extreme duress. So, the F word is aka freaking. I grew up substituting that one, though not a problem here yet. The S word is shut up according to my gal. So no dealing with S*** word yet. Just find something and retrain your thinking that starts with F, S, B, or OMG, that suits you. Or else, just work with their exposure to cusses, as in walking along 7Th Ave any day, not switching the TV channel quick enough when surfing, being around kids who have already mastered the cursing art, etc. 8mo is still young yet, and believe me, the occasional curse overheard at that age will not surpass ma da baba wawa, or stupid f’in b**** (only kidding), etc. My motto is raise them the best you can, while you can, and then just keep your fingers crossed.

That’s freaking right, gosh blummit. It also gives us an idea to count the number of curses we hear next time we walk down the average Brooklyn commercial strip.