Mr. and Mrs. Upper Zoner
(a.k.a.: “The C.G. Flibbertgibbets”)

How I love you
And respect you,
My historical CG neighborhood,
Let me count the ways:
Give me some FAR 2.43
And make it a double.
Give me back my FAR,
I am no:
Flibbertigibbet!
I want more FAR and I want you to
Throw in those front gardens,
Pass the pretzels,
And fill it to the top
With a slice of FAR.
Do you really think I am that:
Stupid?
Give me back my roof top balcony
my Manhattan skyline my satellite dish my cell phone tower
and plant my high paying tenants
waaaaayyyyyy down below
then whydontcha,
throw those crazy nuts,
those anti-development communists:
those clean air psychos with their soy milk cookbooks,
those panic stricken pasta fazools, to the curb where they belong? and
Give me back my FAR you stole:
I am not a DUMBO.

c. 2008 Graciella Radici

(GL Contributor Graziella Radici resides in the Greater Carroll Gardens/Gowanus Metroplex.)